Arrmaitee (arrmaitee) wrote,







SUMMARY: SLASH! PARODY!  You've all read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. But for those who crave an unauthorized, uncensored view of what really happened during the final book’s epilogue - nineteen years after Harry's saucy, slashy romp at Hogwarts - read on…


AUTHOR’S NOTE: I’d like to extend a special thanks to daylyn for her unfailing help and support with this fic. 



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LOLZ! Your fic inspired me to create a community, btw.

Hope you post this fic there cause seeing as it's lacking in love, this would be a wonderful post there.

thedhcrapilogue (I'm not expecting you to post or anything! Just a suggestion!)
Awesome! How could I not post my fic in a new community that I inspired dedicated to remedying J.K.'s crappy epilogue. It's goin' up immediately!

Btw - I just found out that harry_and_ron are having a slashy epilogue challenge so you may want to chat with them about cross-posting fics.


9 years ago

Too fucking good

No wonder Mum wanted us to give our love to him. XD
THAT WAS HILARIOUS! and amazing! and hilarious! I wish it had really ended like that...kind of....i think the image of Harry "giving his love" to dumbledore is beyond my imagining, be it disgusting or just...incomprehensible.

now we know what luna was doing down in that basement to pass the time....ahem. sorry.
Hahahaha, this is amazing. I'd choose this over JK's epilogue any day.
*is in hysterics*

House points for the use of "deathstick". My favourite wand name ever.
Oh, LORD! You made me laugh out loud, you really did... "This is my wife, Goyle." MPreg, LOL XD

MUCH better (and way more believable) than the real epilogue :) Kudos to ya!

You totally deserve about 1,000 internets for cramming in so much slash.

I might take the suggestion of a previous poster and tape this over the "other" epilogue.
I practically pissed my pants in 99% of this fic.

oh my god.... *dies from laughter*
funniest thing I've EVER read in my life. waaay better than the actual epilouge.
OMG, i had to laugh silently because my newborn is asleep, but DAMN you had me going. MORE MORE MORE!Really need some more comic relief!
Roflmao. This is way better than the original epilogue!

I think I'll print it and glue it over the crap J.K came up with ;-)
"Because we live in a fucking tent in Hyde Park, Harry!"

"Your father's been in several Slytherins," Ginny muttered.

Voldette stood inches away from Harry. "I hear you pack a big deathstick," she cooed seductively.

Ginny nodded. “But I’m not using Polyjuice this time,” she warned.

“You don’t want to be Malfoy?” Harry asked, surprised.

*has died of laughter*
my god.
harry's saucy, slashy romp at Hogwarts
oh, it so was!
D'you think anyone would notice if we went around with duct tape and scissors and replaced that other crap with this?'d make a lot of people happy...
I am certainly tempted to "amend" my copy :D
I used to date Voldette during my fifth year and now she sends Nargles to perform the Cruciatus curse on all of my girlfriends.

Just in general.
XD they should rewrite the epilogue like this!
I vote you write the eighth book.
i second that vote

so many lulz, and a complete pity that this wasn't the real epilogue

Deleted comment

Dude... this is better than the original epilogue.
"Your father's been in several Slytherins," Ginny muttered

"This is my son Scorpius and my wife Goyle."

i'm sure this has been quoted before,
but whaha, this really made me laugh out loud :D

lol yay, someone who feels the way I do! I was just about to quote that XD

I laugh every time. EVERY time. Right there.
"This is my son Scorpius and my wife Goyle" and "Your father's been in several Slytherins" just about killed me dead. XDDDD This is awesome. I'm another one of those that like the epilogue, but this is pure, delicious crack.
omg, not coherent after that. i'm in tears!

MUCH better than the "real" epilogue...
Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
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